Submissions and Upcoming Themes

Submissions and Upcoming ThemesThis is where you’ll find the current list of upcoming themes and other ways you can contribute creatively to the National Pasquinade. We’ll try to include some suggestions, but these are not meant to be used verbatim, simply as inspiration. A starting point.

First, we recommend that you read our Submission Guidelines (Revised 5/20/2017).

There are many other ways you can contribute as well.  If you’re artistic and funny, consider submitting a cover for an upcoming issue. If short-form comedy is in your wheelhouse, maybe you’d like to participate in Listeria, our somewhat weekly #hashtag game; create some fake letters for our fake letters column; or suggest a regular short recurring column. For example, I once wrote a parody of travelogue columns called “The Agoraphobic Tourist.” Unfortunately, it didn’t actually recur since the magazine folded before I could really explore any additional possibilities of the character, but I still think the idea was clever and had some real comic potential. If you have a clever idea with some long-term comic potential, pitch the idea and we’ll see where it goes.

I’ve contemplated adding a “…But Seriously…” section in the future, featuring reviews of humorous media (books, television, movies, whatever). This wouldn’t conform to the issue theme and will probably only happen if someone other than me is interested in running it, so let me know if you’d be up for the quarterly commitment at

But, generally, email submissions should always be sent to If you’re submitting for a theme,

indicate which theme you’re submitting for in the subject. If you’re submitting for a different section of the magazine, briefly mention

Sample 3:4 Ratio Cover
Sample 3:4 Ratio Cover

which section in the subject.

The best of the Listeria submissions for each quarter will be collected from Twitter, and replies on our Facebook page and this website.

Note: If you’re submitting a cover, you need to size it in a 3:4 ratio (eg., 600×800) and should leave appropriate space for up to four elements: “National Pasquinade,” “Issue ##” (where ## is the issue number below), the theme as listed below, and, optionally, the publishing date as shown in the image. Note from previous issues that we get a little loose about placement of these elements. An example of the 3:4 sizing can be found by clicking on the image above.

In production:

Issue 78
Fake #
Summer 2017
(Open for Submissions through July 1, 2017)

Themed content needed for cover art, (guest) editorial, Listeria, fake letters column, and themed stories or articles of 1000-5000 words.

Some ideas bounced around for themed stories/articles include:

  • TrumpCare’s Promise: Insurance Fraud For All!
  • America’s Funniest Bomb Threats!
  • The Breitbarty Awards for Best Fake News of 2016


Upcoming issues:

Issue 79
20th Anniversary #
Autumn 2017
(Open for Submissions through September 30, 2017)

Themed content needed for cover art, (guest) editorial, Listeria, fake letters column, and themed stories or articles of 1000-5000 words. Themed stories and articles will be material that could have been in an issue between Spring 1998 and Winter 2015/16. Click here for a list of eligible themes. Please query your story idea first at so that we can prevent any repeats or conflicts.

Some ideas bounced around for themed stories/articles include:

  • Legendary Facial Hair in the White House (No. 46: Unusually Hairy #)
  • I Am Joe’s Wallet (No. 28: Reader’s Digest Parody #)
  • Sparkles: The Uni-leprechaun (No. 64: The Conjured #)


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